Why...why did things have to be like this...i thought it was going so well..but yet this happened..and im not sure if its ever gonna get better...my wishes to be happier is almost gone now...im gonna slap on a mask from now on...im not gonna let the people around me be affected..cuz for this one im alone in it...for some reason i need a shoulder to cry on...someone who i can talk about all this to..and that someone is probably angry with me now...and possibly hating me as well...

I know there are a lot of other people who cares...but im sorry...nows not the time...im probably gonna ignore messages or call...unless im feeling ok...its not that im angry with anyone...im just...not in a state...im most truthful and transparent online or during calls and sms...but now..not even those channels will make me be transparent...

I wish there was someone that knew me...that could be with me...that i could talk to...i had that opportunity to have such a person...but only a few months...because of my mistake this poor person is paying the price...so am i...