Close call

Yeapz...a damn close call..but its not over yet

Im at the risk of having someone find out abt me..the thing abt me that not many ppl know...and some ppl really must never know, becuz i dont know how they will react...or wad will happen yet.

I dont deny..theres many sides of me...however it doesnt mean im lying to a certain grp of ppl, rather its like showing only a part of myself and not the full self.

ppl in poly knows me a lot more, becuz some of them slowly found out the real me..this was something i couldnt control. and now that they found out, im surprised their reaction wasnt big or negative..in fact i even slowly showed more of my "real" self with them, becuz they dont judge, they dont hate and they didnt ostracize me. I wouldnt say im confortable fully with them..but i would say im happy that they didnt leave me.

However there are other places that cannot know that side of me...and unfortunately one of it is my favourite place, BB. Unfortunately, no matter how close i am to them, they can never know that side of me. The side of me i give in BB is just the positive side, happy, cheerful, caring. that is really wad i want them to know of me...i show all these to the poly side as well..but just that they were more accepting. I dont think the BB ppl will ever accept it...and i dont wanna risk it either. I dont want to deal with the misconceptions or fear...and i dont want them to see me in a different light. They are all still young, maybe even not mature enough to handle the information. maybe thats why. In poly, most of them are matured and able to think more rationally, but in secondary school..it can be a different story.

Close friend? how about them. well they probably get the fullest version of me. but it depends on whether they know the true me or not...that i leave it up to them to slowly figure out. As for those who already know, im glad that i can still call them frens.

hmm...seems like im going to have to tread lightly these few days, i know myself well, i accidently slip up information very easily, especially when its myself and to a person im close to. I dont want to risk  it...and end up losing friends or being hated.

"E"...wish you were back with me...i never had to hide anything from you...you always had the true and fullest me