Oh guess what...it appears that i officially lost a friend on Facebook.
Haha weird...cuz it was so nostalgic...around a year ago...i was typing a person's names out to check on that person..only to realized im no longer friends, i smsed the person, and got the worst news of my life..the news that made me who i am today.
SO wads so nostalgic...well i just went to facebook, thought of someone and typed the persons name out just to check on that person, guess what...not friends. those 5 seconds, sudden pain the the chest, worry, panic and curiosity...exactly the same as one year ago. just different person, and kinda different status..one was a friend and one was much more...but the effects were the same.
It never easy to lose a friend i guess...but one junior once told me "you need to learn to let go". well i told her i don't want to...becuz some ppl are important..well she did scorn a little at me...but still i stayed true..and it did improve..but really what i learnt from that is simple, playing this kinda social games, sometimes if the other party holds the reins...let them hold it...no point taking control over it...you can put in the effort...but it would be in vain..go with his flow...(which i just realized isnt that wad all guys in relationships do...go with their girls flow?...lol random) but still...sometimes gaining control over a situation is not exactly the best method...let time be the judge of an outcome.
having said that tho..it doesn't mean i wont miss this person, nor the ROYAL JACK IN THE ASSHOLE one year ago...things like this wont change..to me its kinda simple for me..once you're my friend...i wont abandon you..on any circumstances.
So what am i gonna do? well im going to be myself...but not as bad as i was last time..im still going to try and get that friend back..but no as aggressively as it was before...one attempt, a friend request attached with a message...and that's it..everything else...its up to him...
sometimes i wonder...cuz i know..my loyalty to my ex is the very reason why im pained right now...even tho its been so long, and "E" has treated me so badly (among good of course)...im still loyal to "E", "E" told me to wait for "E" to come back...and im going to wait...wait until everything really is lost before i move on...well...i dunno if this courtesy can be extended to friends or not...maybe it will..maybe loyalty will kill me again, but i believe loyalty will win it thru as well (oh gosh an optimistic me...im on drugs i tell you :D)
oh oh one last thing...UNISIM still sucks ,,!,,
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